Date an Ethnic

I hate people that only date within their race. This idea that their tribe or community is the heart of the universe is such arrogance. For starters it limits the dating pool. For enders it creates genetically weak children. 

You need to be a strong person to go against your guilting mother. Just because your mom chose to be a rule follower, and choosing to stay within her tribe, dedicating her only life to meekly follow the path, doesn't mean you have to. Its classic confirmation bias. Don't judge her for it. Most people are weak. Most people sit on the hump of the bell curve. You have to forge for yourself. Open your eyes and really quantify your best options. 

Several of my middle eastern female friends are in this conundrum. Persian women are beautiful creatures. With giant brown eyes with strong well shaped eyebrows. They are very into their skin and my god does it show. Even their bodies are fantastic. They have these tiny waists, huge hips and gorgeous breasts! Would go lesbian for a persian women 10/10. Weirdly enough these beautiful women are raised as second class citizens, compared to their brothers. Usually treated like the prince of the family. So you have these beautiful girls who are overcompensating, taught that their only job is to keep a clean house and cook. Then you have their fat, conceited counterpart. The men usually gain weight in their thighs, and cant seem to pluck their eyebrows. Personally I think it's one of life's tragedies. So they marry someone who doesn't respect them to keep their shrill mother happy. Just writing this makes me incredibly sad. And a good portion of basic white boys would worship the ground they walk on. 

I married outside of my culture, and at times it's kinda hard. Part of his family doesn't accept me. They don't tell their kids about me. They won't invite me over for Friday night dinner. I wouldn't even describe it as an uphill battle, It's just me splashing alone in a lake trying to create waves. I can't win. I can't fight a culture that has been curated to stay resilient. 

Sometimes I think maybe I should have married a white guy from my neck of the woods. Have some kind white mom who can fulfil my mommy issues. A woman who can give me advice. Who would share my love of Ralph Lauren, The Bachelor, and her son. Some woman who can understand my sense of humor. 

But I chose a yosef. On our first date I marveled at the fact that I had never met anyone like him. He was self made. His work ethic! He only spoke kind words. His fast paced mind. A Lot of his traits could easily be traced back to his upbringing. It's basically a catch 22. The problem is the very mousetrap that I fell into. Would he be my joe if he was born into a regular anglosaxton family from tustin. I doubt it. He had to fight his way to my world. 

Our children will be genetically diverse. They will be able to experience more holidays, and be able to pick and choose different lessons from each parent. Luckily Joe and I both have different blind spots so together we have a good view of the world.


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