And I’m Like “Why Are You So Obsessed With Me?”

What causes obsession? The times that I have fallen hard for a man or an ideology have also consistently been when my life has been in turmoil. Is the bigger the obsession, the bigger the hole in your life? It makes sense that high school age is when people are the most stir crazy. There you have no freedom, but with four hours of homework added to it. Of course they’re looking for something to hyper focus on. That five minute conversation with that hot guy, Stew, from geometry, translates into a two hour phone conversation with their best friend. What else can they focus on and idealize? The future! Ba-humbug!!! That ship has sailed back in the nineties.  

“The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing - and then marry him. “

— Cher

It makes sense that women are usually the ones that get all excited about nothing. Historically, what have women got? All she can hope for is to bag some rich Stew, so that she can have some other poorer bitch wash her unmentionables. They go out and slay the dragon/crunch those numbers. Men have careers. 

Men take the obsession route a bit different, after they've fought the dragon, and now live in a comfortable suburb. Quietly living their life until one day they realize that death is nearing, or worse, that they are actually just ordinary lil’ Stews. That's when the secretary becomes more and more appealing.  

Religion might count as one too. My grandmother, after being excommunicated by the family, promptly decided to join Mormonism. 

That being said, you might think I'm against obsession. And to that, I say NAY! We need something to strive for. We all want to feel loved and important. We want to be seen. Just make sure you're not a dog chasing its tail. Be a dog chasing a bull's penis. Sink your teeth in and enjoy the prize.